"Thy Flashing Eyes in the Sky" ... my first English poem

Dear friends,

This is my first poem in English. I write some poetry in Arabic, my
mother language, but now, this is a new experiment for me and I hope it could
stand at the threshold of your elevated taste satisfaction.
Let you with the poem.

Thy Flashing Eyes in the Sky

In the time the brightening sun does fade ..

And the heavy waves of rains do blow

And the deep sad love that hides in shade

Comes up to lips by augmenting grow.

Amidst such storms whom sorrows invade

Thy lovely face, the rains would show.

The glittering eyes, of peace are made,

of thou, make peace, with tempest though

And could it be the rains that raid

Draw your eyes, or me who draw?

Looking forward to reading your comments.

Regards,
Sofia Grain (Mr)

Dear Admin,

I wrote a very long reply about your poem but while posting, an error occured here. Anyway, it is very fanciful and fantastic poem indeed. I liked the personification in the poem so much, and regarding my comments I have one about the word "draw" in the last line, it is not the same rhyme as " blow" and etc.
Anyway, it is a nice poem.

Regards

Hi Heron,
Yes, this is one of the earliest useful comment I get. I hope I would receive more comments. Thank you very much for taking some of your time to write your long comment which unfortunately was lost by error. Also thank you for your existent comment. This is supporting !!

Best regards,
Sofia Grain (Mr)